The Drink Cart: Forks Out
The feeds overflowed with food and beverage ads and stories this week. Let's unpack the flavours of fall in this nearly all-food newsletter edition.
Dear Drink Carters and possibly The Great Pumpkin
When I said this edition of the Newsletter was going to be about food, I bet you thought it was going to be all things like, what’s the best butter for every situation. A very valid question. Answer: when in doubt, fancy salted.
I think this week’s theme all started with me watching a Netflix season worth of videos from The Spud Brothers on Tiktok. I’m not even kidding - i probably watched 50 videos - my feed is nothing but this. It’s a baked potato - sorry jacket potato - truck. That’s it. And it’s the absolute algorithmic slop my brain craved this week. And I’m never thinking about liquified garlic butter the same ever again. And I say that as I’m about to publish and Mischief just dropped a limited time personal sized Pizza Hut store. Miniature is an all time best thing to do.
So maybe you came for a take about the luxury branding of the new restaurant from Alan Yau, Chyna Club (it’s kind of giving mid-aughts Buddakan vibes, but more high end and slightly mysterious?). Maybe you expected some sort of press release-style statement about my dislike of New York baseball clubs and the growing rage that this McDonald’s billboard with Grimace’s involvement with the New York Mets gives me. Or even the off-brand sandwich shops making purple Grimace bread?
It’s far more likely that you expected - given previous Substack ands social fights with fake waters like “Not Beer” - that this new premium celebrity non-alcoholic beer from Tom Holland would get a full review. Listen, if the celebs are into near beer, it just means they’re giving up on tequila and rose. To which I say, good. But premium celebrity no-booze beer no matter how slick it looks (and that is “very slick” btw) on its website, is a “no from me dawg”. Hot take: You shouldn’t even be allowed to call it beer.
I’ll also say, despite the theme of this edition, I’m not wasting my time on Boba tea appropriation controversies with Simu Liu, a Quebec ready to drink Boba called Bobba on Dragons Den. CBC content? I would never. I liked one post that said, “It's like Americans getting pissy about a knock off McRib.” And instead of whatever this questionable VC-raising high protein Bagel company that has melted down is, we’re simply enjoying the Greggs Champagne Bar at Fenwick. Yes, please give me a £4 sausage roll served with a £75 glalas of Louis Roederer Cristal right now. Remember this is just 2 weeks after Greggs shared thier golden merch collection. That’s high functioning brand building at work there.
Have what Jackson Lamb is having, pop a Thanksgiving Pizza into your little oven and settle in for your trending food, beverage and ad news:
Mcnugget nostalgia, big ranch dips and human Scooby snacks
Campari goes to the movies, a battery ad we couldn’t resist and AI restaurants
Vintage French sausage ads, stadium food in boxes and the perfect Sphere ad
A complete Troll job for the hat of the week and a Toronto is the center of the universe cocktail
1. The McNugget Halloween Universe
I’ve watched this old McDonald ads a few times a day for over a week. It’s just so action packed. The ad ran from 1988-1990 and did two things masterfully well. In the first part of the ad, it’s pure world building of McNugget Castle - sorry, i think the proper term is Nuggetvania Castle. The script so full of Dad-joke puns in such a short time I want to get a signed copy of the script.
In the second part, it casually just introduces Boo Buckets. That’s insane. It seems all Boo Bucket ads are amazing and there is a very passionate fan base for them. You can’t talk about nuggets without sauces. Sauce is the most important part - and I’m a Hot Mustard enthusiast. But I saw this rant - maybe it’s a tirade - about equating not getting sauce in your order with getting spit in the face. That’s just science.
2. Big Ranch Dip Energy
Burger King launched a very big full-sized Ranch dip cup for burgers. Is this the start of an Ozempic backlash? I adore that the writer on this idea said, “this is what happens when you give a ranch dressing brief to a creative from the midwest.” Instant follow.
3. Human Scooby Snacks
According to Snackolator (yes, I follow it) Walmart is making our childhood dreams come true with human-grade Scooby Doo appetizers, or Scooby Snacks to you and me. These dangerous looking yum-yums come in five bonkers versions: Parmesan Puff Bites, Taco Pockets, Nacho Cheese Bites, Mac & Cheese Bites, and Pizzaquitos.
Full disclosure, I want a box of each of these plus a box of each of these new chocolate bar pies. Hersheys Chocolate Creme pie? Just say less.
4. Campari goes to the movies
When I first saw this come up in my feed from The Drum, I was like film noir is a weird choice for a brand that is so iconically red. But the Film Noir is just one ad in the series - there is a technicolor looking 60’s Spy Film and a 90’s Crime movie. They are growing on me.
5. Throwback ad of the week
Is this the greatest battery ad of all time?
6. The Austin restaurant that doesn’t exist
I’m fascinated by Austin, Texas restaurant Ethos. The “restaurant” has over 73,000 followers on Instagram by sharing the most obviously and outrageously AI generated things who all seem to play along.
The bio is so AI that it’s almost what someone might actually write: “Ethos is the fundamental values and beliefs that define the character and culture of an individual, organization, or community.” Which sounds more like the, “Moisture is the essence of wetness” from Zoolander.
7. The 100+ year old sausage ad that goes all the way
In !919, French consumers wanted to know about purity of food - they’re just like us! So they obviously showed a very much alive pig butchering himself into delicious bits paired with a headline that is just hardcore: “We eat with pleasure and . . . without fatigue.”
8. Food in cute boxes are so in right now
If you’re not putting your chicken tenders in a Zamboni box, are you really living in the 2024 timeline? The Boston Bruins have done just that. And not to be outdone, the Chicago Blackhawks are offering up a 24oz beer in a hockey stick.
9. The Mac Sphere
Okay, we are just bookending the main content of this Newsletter with McDonalds content - this is not sponsored, just passion. The Las Vegas Sphere was made for advertising burgers. McDonald’s took advantage of that to share the Chicken Big Mac. Sphere advertising is the best. Speaking of burgers, when I’m not watching potato-toks, I keep watching this charming Tiktok about how do you say burger?
10. Hat of the week: The Trolliest Hat Of All Time
You thought I was going to talk about New York Mayor’s now ridiculed Half-Yankees, Half-Mets hat. But now, the most hilarious hat I saw this week - which I honestly thought was totally fake, but is in fact available on the Trump store for $40.
It’s the Little Red Maga Hat - it’s a hat on a hat. Or what I’ve seen referred to as the “Hat Hat”. Genius. It is funnier even than Trump dancing for over half hour. I feel like MLB would actually make a killing selling these for every teams.
Last call: The Drink Cart Toronto
Listed in Robert Vermeire's 1922 edition of Cocktails: How to Mix Them, was a cocktail said to be “much appreciated by the Canadians of Toronto.” It could have just been that they happened to have a lot of Toronto guests at a bar in London. That seems unlikely.
Here’s the thing, it also would have been kind of weird for Torontonians to be in such a supply of Italian bitter Fernet-Branca in the height of prohibition to be making Old Fashioned variants with Fernet. Nevertheless, this bittersweet version is simply a great idea - especially on a crisp October Friday afternoon.
Here’s your Toronto Cocktail
2 oz rye whisky
1/2 ounce Fernet-Branca
Baby splash of simple syrup - I don’t like it too sweet
4 dashes Angostura bitters
Stir with ice and then pour over a nice big cube
Garnish it with an orange twist
Your Bonus Drink Cart Approved™ agency discussion topics paired down to a reasonable five links. Click on them.
Must watch: Take me to one of these 1960s annual games of the Land Rover Owners Club. Incredible video.
The magical translation camera move from Hunt for Red October.
Are you buying the Costo Armageddon Cart?
Don’t mind me, I’ll be making cocktails with the energy of 1953’s "The Big Heat" as soon as Friday comes along.
Drop me a comment below or tell me how your weekly drink turned out.
The Drink Cart is a weekly newsletter of advertising, pop culture, baseball and cocktails from Jackson Murphy.
Nice round up Jackson. I can’t help but love the Sphere McDonald’s ad. But that French sausage ad is horrifying.