The Drink Cart: Floating through the noise
The only newsletter that drops anchor in your Figma file and serves up post-royal rose on the poop deck.
Dear marketing fans, sugarloaf nostalgia seekers and people who wanted to launch one hundred foot boat activations for your brand.
Sometimes there are stories so dumb you can’t imagine them being real. But I was reading people still reacting this article about how Gen Z has invented vacations but called them “Micro-retirements”. That’s how found myself continually coming back to this one image (in our header) in a tab with the simple caption, “Urge to drop everything and become a simple fisherman on the Mediterranean rising.” What do we call that?
I also kind of fell in love with this story that came along my feed this week. Did you know that sugar cubes were invented “by a husband in the 1840s so his wife wouldn't keep hurting herself chopping giant sugar loaves just to sweeten her tea. so he made perfect little cubes. just for her.” It’s true.
Now with so much AI slop going around I did have to check. And sure enough my dude, Jacob Christoph Rad had to figure out a solution to deal with the impossible “Sugarloafs” after his wife hurt herself while chopping one. A love story for the ages.
But not a marketing or business success story. Despite getting the patent for this in 1843 for a sugar cube press, he didn’t really make any money off this invention. Of course 30 years later someone figured out how to mass produce the sugar cubes. And in 2025 I’m just thinking about a world where we just had loafs of sugar hanging about and blunt instruments to break them into our food and drinks
And yes, this was all in service of getting to sharing the clip of Homer’s sugar pile.
Drink Cart Approved™ agency discussion topics
There are so many things in this influencer video about Diet Cokes and adding sparkles to it to discuss. We’re adding glitter bombs to our drinks now?
Good news everyone. As of this morning there are only 99 days until Hallmark’s Countdown to Christmas and the onslaught of Christmas movies.
This story about the new trend in horse racing is such a wild read.
Just newsletter it. Nike now has a Substack newsletter. Just like us.
Sneaky Baseball Content: The 1933 All Star Game Ticket design is unbelievable.
Ad History: Jersey Milk (1990)
The shameless nostalgia in this 1990 Jersey Milk chocolate bar was clearly not enough to keep the brand alive. Just 35 years after this ad played (which feels like a completely different world now) the Canadian brand is being discontinued. The brand, which started over 100 years ago in 1924 won’t make it to 2026.
I’m not nostaglic over the brand. it was one of those ones you kind of dreaded at Halloween along with the Special Dark. But if you had to eat it, it was fine. It was no Krackle. First The Bay, Now Jersey Milk. What Canadian brand falls next?
It’s the gravy, stupid
I’ve never really thought about it, but being baptized in a gravy lake doesn’t seem like the worst way to go. Grok, successfully back to normal from its off the deep end moments this week, describes why this ad works in a way that I just can’t: “Shock from the cannibalistic parody hooks your attention, while gravy's savory allure triggers dopamine-fueled cravings. Cognitive dissonance at work—fear flips to desire.”
I wonder how that played in the initial pitch deck? Something like this:
CLIENT 1: “Wait—so the gravy lake is so good… they are eating themselvesf?”
STRATEGIST: “Well, yes. But more emotionally, it’s eating for itself. The gravy is that powerful.”
CLIENT 2: (long pause) “Okay, that’s insane. But I can’t stop picturing it. What’s the insight?”
STRATEGIST: “Cognitive dissonance. The fear makes you freeze. The gravy makes you crave. Your brain doesn’t know what to do, so it watches.”
CREATIVE DIRECTOR: “Exactly. It’s disturbing. It’s delicious. It’s dinner.”
CLIENT 1:“Let me get this straight: We’re betting the campaign on cannibalism?”
ACCOUNT PERSON: “We prefer to call it ‘flavor-forward emotional disruption.’”
Compare this one to another KFC ad that transforms finger licking good into the Victorian era. The classic little agency detail in the Strategy Magazine article about it is that of course they filmed the Canadian ad in Prague.
Three things about Meghan Markle’s new Rose
I can’t believe Meghan Markle launched a rose too. The new As Ever product has already sold out. She’s charging $30 a bottle for what I can only assume is post-royal emotional support wine. Here’s three sentences from the website that made me question everything.
Everything on the site feels like it was written by Derek Zoolander after saying, “Moisture is the essence of wetness and wetness is the essence of beauty". No offence to Derek Zoolander.
“Thoughtfully curated by Meghan, Duchess of Sussex” - How does one curate a rose? Was there a spreadsheet? A vision board?
“Crafted for slow afternoons and golden-hour gatherings” - But if you curated it, was it crafted for these things? Was Harry out back crushing grapes?
“This rosé captures the essence of sun-drenched outdoor moments through its thoughtfully crafted blend.” - You have to chug a bottle every time she says thoughtfully. Unfortunately, that’s the only pairing note.
I missed in the original launch that if you sign up for emails Megs promises you’ll “Get more surprise and delight in your inbox.” That sounds like a threat. Or an email from Gwyneth Paltrow’s burner account.
Three words: Hot Dog Boat
We interrupt this newsletter to bring you the greatest boat ever seen on water.
Toot Toot Louis V
Speaking of boats, the new Louis Vuitton store in Shanghai is pretty unreal. It’s shaped as 30-meter high ship, The Louis. There’s instagramable moments, then there is making your flagship store into an immersive ship on land.
Domino’s Delivery in Mykonos
I’m not sure why you would want Domino’s if you’re in the sun in Mykonos, but from a value prop of it’s delivery service, this works so well. Sharing the idea that “no matter where you end up… pizza finds you” is smart for the best trash-pizza maker in the world.
Last call: The Drink Cart Gimlet
Here’s one you don’t think about every day. But since we have nautical themed content, why not do a cocktail with some naval roots and a little attitude. The story goes that sailors in the British Royal Navy in the late 19th century needed a way to make their daily dose of lime juice, taken to prevent scurvy, a little more palatable.
The hero of the day was gin of course. The drink likely gets its name from either the small hand drill called a gimlet (probably not) or from Surgeon Rear-Admiral Sir Thomas Gimlette, who was said to have first mixed lime juice with gin for the fleet.
The cocktail was made with gin and preserved lime cordial (like Rose’s Lime), the Gimlet evolved over time into a more balanced version with fresh lime juice and simple syrup. Now you can enjoy that classic easy to make cocktail to contemplate marketing wins and losses for the week.
Here’s my take on the recipe:
2oz Gin
3/4 oz fresh squeeze lime juice (or if you want to go old school get the Rose’s Lime Cordial)
1/2 oz simple syrup
Shake well with ice and strain into a coupe glass.
If thinking about the Royal Navy and drinking a gimlet doesn’t make you happy, I’d recommend a rewatch of Master and Commander, immediately. It’s a crime they only made of these movies.
The Drink Cart is your weekly fuel for pop culture brains and ad junkies. A cocktail of ad insights and hot takes that feel like you’re hanging at your favourite dive bar after launching your latest campaign.
RIP Jersey Milk chocolate bar. My OG chocolate for childhood s’mores.